Yes, being a Christian and practicing what Christ taught and LIVED is usually difficult, I'm sorry to say, probably for most of us. Forgiveness does more good than one might think. Sorry to go Biblical on yo' ass, but it is written, 'Don't let the sun goes down on your wrath,' and if you're angry, 'sin not.' In recovery circles, it is frequently said, "Resentments are the #1 Offender" and lead more people back to the bottle than any other single thing.
For me, simply stated because most truths are simple, "God is Love." In short, if it ain't about Love, it ain't about God.
As a speaker and compassionate Public Healer, I've helped our speaking teams struggle to help carry the grief of HUNDREDS of victims over the last 29 in MADD, Minnesotan's for Safe Driving, and other organizations.
Our struggle is no easy road to traverse. For the first eight years of speaking, my grief almost killed me on countless occasions. Eventually, I forgave myself which is not to say what I did was "OK," 'sanitizing' or 'justifying' it or something pathetic like that. Those who struggle with forgiveness might believe such is the case, but I forgive them, too, for they know not what the F they are doing.
One of the hardest things I ever did in my life was not killing myself over the grief. Love & forgiveness healed me enough to understand truths beyond description. God loved and healed me despite my f-ups. We Love for we were first Loved.
We all know this stuff, but so few of us are willing to go to any lengths for our Creator. Phoenix (rising from the proverbial ashes) and 490 (Christ said to forgive forgiving 70x7) are making a difference. Phoenix 490 will makes its' mark on hearts.