In all of my years free or in the monastery (prison...lol), I've never understood how a fellow human being could look into the eyes of a depressed or traumatized human being, and not have their heart break with compassion for that person.
Everyone's traumatized during their life at some time or other, but some people act that trauma out on others.
Seeing people's hearts wax cold is beyond my comprehension experientially. I can say, yeah, they are traumatized. Yeah, something happened to them and I wonder what could have made them like that (so cold, fearful, or even hateful). For years, I have said that healed people heal people, and this because I heard Joyce Meyers say that 'hurting people hurt people'.
But even on my worst day, the REAL Timothy never attacked someone out of one of those emotions. The EGO Timothy has done some things, though, and I suspect trauma made remembering who I really am difficult. Anger seethed in my heart and mind to the near-boiling point on many an occasion. But how do we fix it? Is there anything to 'fix?'
Look into the eyes of your fellow. Look deeply. You will see YOU if you look long enough. See their true essence, their Origins, the part of them that has innocence beyond trauma. This is the part of us that goes toward the light when we pass, leaving everything else behind, and experiences unsurpassable Conscious Love.
But I'm not trying to make NDE's my Talking Point, per se.
On 8/19/90 at my first meeting in Roach Hall (the Stillwater Alano Club ) I heard some really good suggestions, one being to 'Look for the good'.
So I started looking for Messages from God in everything. IMO, if we look FROM the good, we'll SEE the good IN others. I heard someone say that the Talmud reflects on what we see comes from who we are; we don't see life the way it is, but see life the way we are. Buddha said something similar. When the student is ready, the teacher appears. I'm in charge of what I say and you're in charge of what you hear.
HOWEVER, If I have turned my will and life over to the care of God (as I understand God), then I can truly say that I am not in charge of what I say or hear. God is.
That being said, an old friend in sobriety (Baron...RIP) used to say, "If you don't like something I say, take it up with God. God's the reason I'm alive."
Every good thing I have in my life came from the wisdom of others, almost without exception, because God opened my surrendered mind and heart. We didn't quit. We surrendered.
Let’s make it a WE life. It's a WE Program. Let's not shoot our wounded. Practice this principle in all your affairs, and you’ll look down and see you’ve been walking on the water of Grace for a long time. And on the hard days, pray for that SOB.