Personally, I don’t trust perfect people. Kid Rock sang that we should get in the pit and love someone. Jesus said it and did it, too.
But there’s an obverse to every idea. “I don't trust people who don't love themselves and tell me, 'I love you.' … That is an African saying which basically reflects as follows: “Be careful when a naked person offers you a shirt.” ― Maya Angelou
This topic of trust and hypocrisy has always affected me, because it is part of my life work to tell people I love them, despite my imperfections, and I occasionally see people recoil from their own reactions due to their woundedness. I am to love you as you are, which obverse is that you let me love you as I am. But Mother Teresa weighed in on this, too, and said, "Love them anyway".
I don't have to trust people. People don't have to 'earn my trust', but they might have to earn my distrust. I am not fond of shame-based, guilt-ridden, controlling philosophies. I trust God which to me means I trust people through that lens, and not the other way around.
The scriptures reflect a divine sequence, in that they first read we should love God and then love others as ourselves. Self-love is not mandated to precede all other love. I find many people get confused when they hear the words, "I love you", like the naked man handing someone a shirt. We all fall short of what we want to be, and in varied areas of our lives. We have defects, imperfections and are sometimes naked handing someone a shirt.
There have been days in life where I or someone else would have been in danger of harming someone by virtue of loving them as they love themselves. If I feel like shyte about myself today and treat you like I treat myself, then I will fail you. A suicidal person rarely wants to harm anyone else when they check out. The ones that do get plenty of press, but they are rare.
Self-esteem can sometimes be reckless, insensitive, angry, judgmental and downright selfish. Selfishness is not a virtue.
Self-esteem never goes as far as God Esteem. The Holy Spirit does not see naked men with shirts. That's why it is called The Comforter.
Copywriteby timothy g cameron 7/2015, tweaked on 7/17/21
The version found written on the wall in Mother Teresa's home for children in Calcutta:
People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered.
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies.
Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you.
Be honest and sincere anyway.
What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight.
Create anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous.
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today will often be forgotten.
Do good anyway.
Give the best you have, and it will never be enough.
Give your best anyway.
In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.
-this version is credited to Mother Teresa
Like Mother Teresa, but in my own context, I believe it is none of my business what others think of me. But it is also none of my business what I think of me. My business is what God thinks of me.