Crapitalist Multitasking:  No Ego Left Behind

In my career to date, I embarrassingly admit having lost two positions of employment due to my "inability to multitask." That is to say; I possessed the unwillingness to perform the work of more than one person at a time in the interest of "profit" at the expense of my emotional well-being.  I either have a diabolical delusion as to the purported divinity of Crapitalism, or I am guilty of a simple aversion to avarice. 

 

To those that swear by the pseudo-supremacy of multitasking, maybe I owe you amends. Unfortunately for this writer, it is scientifically arguable that males generally have an innate inability to perform multitasking, while females can punk slap Janus with the eight arms of Shiva.  


Why?  Primarily, women possess more White Matter in the brain than men.  White Matter matters, because it allows both hemispheres of ones’ brain to more successfully interact and ‘semi-function,' together, as ONE unit.  Semi-function?  I say this with an agenda (drum roll) hear that?  It's the sound of a Zenlike ONE EGO Clapping, with the sublingual taste of severe, tongue-in-cheek ruminating-arthritis plastering my tasteless buds, AKA, jealousy. 

 

Money used to be our servant, but shortly after its creationistic death imbued our societal soul with sadistic justifications and war, many of us became its slave.  


Because schizophrenic-multitasking has dominated the professional landscape of the American psyche, t takes courage to stand in front of an armed ego and tell the truth.  


Studies have been done to combat the fallacies of multitasking, but who is listening?  The weapons of mass distraction prevail upon this male mind?  Naw, I just have two creative sides of my brain that argue about everything.